some Random things...

welll!!! here goes...

1. i still havent cried !!!
2. i wish i could.
3. i wrote a poem today ... i will post it later!!!
4. i am doing noticably better at college.
5. i want to slap the dream till he becomes mature and grows up...
6. i downloaded havana nights (dirty dancing 2)
7. i loved the flick ....
8. i miss dancing...
9. i want to dance...
10. i want to fly
11. i want to cut myself just so that i could find out how it hurts...
12. i want to cry...
13. my grandma is admitted to the hospital...
14. there are major family politics going on...
15. they trouble me...
16. i miss saurabh some times... specially the last couple of days...
17. ARMS OF MERCY IS STUCK..... I WANT TO DO SOMETHING....
18. i just took a deep breath...
19. i saw 12 french short films today...
20. the dream says he loves me now....
21. i say he doesnt even know what love is...
22. he accuses me of torchering him.... where as i m not doin anything.... i never promised him anything....
23. i want to die...
24. i want to heal...
25. i fainted 4 times in the past 4 days...
26. my blood pressure is low...
27. i think i am reallllly whiny right now.....lol
28. i want a hug....
29. i met a cute guy....
30. he made me laugh a lot...
31. i had a good time with him... and then forgot my purse in the rickshaw.... i lost my grandpa's signed note...
32. i want to die...
33. i want to go to a meadow....
34. i want to run like there is notthing else in the world to do...
35. i want to die...
36. nah i want to live... i dont want to die at all....
37. i want to have at least one good prayer a day...
38. i am not having them these days...
39. gaurav(ma lil bro) failed in all his papers in his unit tests..
40. i feel responsible...
41. i miss dad...
42. i need a hug and some time to wallow....
43. i need to hold someone and feel peaceful...
44. i love dance... its makes me happy....
45. i am doing a project on zulu culture...
46. i love my mom...
47. i am down with a viral infection ....
48. i want to heal....
49. no no no no.....................i want to be healed.... please...
50. i feel like i m suffocating...
51. i remember one of "crush chronicle's" posts where she had written that she involuntarily flirts and she doesnt even realise it... i think i can relate to that.... i think i do that too...
52. i want love...
53. if not love at least some hapiness
54. if not happiness at least sorrow...
55. if not sorrow at least pain
56. if not pain, atleast touch.... the touch of something protecting me....
57. i am confused....